The Ashcan

The LOST Interrobang: Dharma Munchies! (S6E16)

Posted on 20. May, 2010 by theashcan in Television, The Lost Interrobang

Knowing that the ingredients for a good LOST episode is a healthy mix of “!!” and “??” Jef and Anupa will be interrobanging the show’s final season every week. As LOST winds down to its conclusion, can its creators dish out all the needed explanations without resorting to exposition? Can they keep up the mystery without succumbing to just more mindfuckery?

This was it. “What They Died For” was the last “set up episode” of Lost we’ll ever sit through, and it set some shit up! Last week we got the back story, this week those ideas were applied to actions and during the finale this Sunday, we’ll see how it all plays out. We’re down to the Oceanic Four: Kate, Jack, Sawyer and Hurley, finally powwow-ing with Jacob, being given the tools to fight off Smocke. And on the other side of the island, Ben and Smocke are traipsing through the jungle, on the search for Desmond—the fail-safe. Off-island, all signs point to most of our pals converging at a museum benefit concert. What does the finale promise? Two full-cast showdowns happening in two different realities. This is gonna be redonk, guys. In the meantime, tally ho! (Do I really need to warn for spoilers?) SIGH. SPOILERSSZ.

Jef: I’m actually kind of sad

This is our PENULTIMATE interrobang

Everyone kept saying penultimate all week.

Anupa: yeah, OMG, I can make plans next Tuesday night! But we won’t have our weekly chats, where we catch up on each other’s lives and generally enjoy each other’s company online.

Can I advocate a theory?

Jef: Go

Anupa: I actually think this is hole-proof: so in the first episode we saw the island underwater and now we know Smokey can’t get off or things will be fucked so they gotta kill him.

So what if they sink the island…TO PUT OUT THE SMOKE?

Jef: I feel you!

In this episode when Ben asked Smoke why he walks, he answered because he likes the feel of grass between his toes or something

(Good moment!)

But I was like: BUT WHY DO YOU LIKE ROWING BOATS, SMOKE?

WHY DO YOU LIKE ROWING BOATS?

Anupa: EXACTLY.

Jef: So yeah maybe you’re right.

Water.

Haha that would be mad Shyamalan Signs

Anupa: It would be so perfectly logical.

HAHAHAHAH IT WOULD BE

That movie was really shit.

Jef: It really was!

Anupa: Okay well now that I feel we solved it, I have nothing more to discuss.

Jef: K thanks bye guys.

Ok let’s start back at jump: we start with Jack looking at his neck hole

It’s funny that we’ve come to the point that this show is already mirroring what happened just 15 episodes ago or whatever.

If it went to season 7 each episode would just mirror the last, until the scenes are just exactly the same.

Anupa: LOL

Jef: I still don’t get the wound though!

Anupa: Me neither. I feel like these things are details that will hopefully get explained away.

Jef: Oh yeah, I’m sure it’s tied to whatever happens to Jack in the finale.

Which maybe means VAMPIRES.

Aha imagine?

Anupa: Robert Pattinson cameo!

*swoon*

Jef: Stop swooning for him! It devalues your other swoons.

Anupa: Speaking of swoons, and people who have worked with Robert Pattinson, last week’s episode threw me off and I was confused when Claire walked into Jack’s dining room. The flow was really disrupted with that mythology episode last week eh?

Jef: Oh word, yes. Yeah I had a hard time placing where everyone was.

Anupa: (Also roomie remarked that Claire was cute as a button in this scene).

Jef: Like…what happened to crazy island Claire? Not that she had to be in this episode, but her absence was jarring.

Roomie gets a hi-five

Anupa: She is with Locke, on the docke

Jef: Oh and speaking of the randoms

I cannot fucking believe Miles made it to the finale! That is so awesome.

Anupa: HAHHAHA and he’s still shifty and awesome

He’s gotten by on oneliners

Jef: Haha yeah one-liners and generall ducking.

He’s always “Wha? Peace I’m out.”

Anupa: The comment he made about living on the island before Ben (“yeah, like last week”) was both funny and interesting

Jef: Yeah guy, it’s been one week?

Anupa: What’s the timeline been? It hasn’t literally been a week right?

Jef: That’s crazy.

It could be though, yeah! They haven’t really done much when you think about it. Just escaped from a temple and saw a lighthouse and shit.

(And died.)

Anupa: This show really needs to be watched nonstop, as you subsist on Cheetos and Coke and stay up super late and wake up super early anyway to keep watching.

Jef: I’m saying

I still can’t believe how y’all watched this one ep a week for six years. (For those who don’t know, I marathoned through seasons 1-5 on DVD right before this season’s premiere).

Anupa: So Miles took off, Richard wanted to be diplomatic and got shoved, and Ben baited out Widdy and Liz Lemon

Jef: Haha man that Richard-shove was so embarassing. Like, we’ve all seen that happen or been that dude.

Anupa: What do you think Ben’s deal is?

Jef: Ben is back to being BEN, which I love

He’s got something up his sleeve for sure.

And I loved loved loved the way he murked Widmore.

Anupa: YEAH

I’d venture to say that shit was gully.

Jef: It’s true. Gully is back, and it’s Ben Linus

Anupa: You know what’s even more amazing?

That Ben shot a person, but was also so honourable in this episode

God, if there’s any reason to advocate for the sideways timeline being the “better” version of their lives, Ben is the prime example

He’s so different

Jef: Yeah, he was both. It’s been a great journey with dude; remember when he was just this big mystery? This ep was good for just showing Ben at 100 per cent, a cold-ass murderer but also a big teddy bear.

Dude, what happened to Miles?

Wasn’t he is the secret room with Widdy and Mz. Lemon?

Anupa: No he ran off remember?

Ben gave him the walkie talkie

Jef: Ahh word

Shit, he’s all alone.

Haha he’s gonna die, isn’t he?

Anupa: Dude, he’ll prob just grab the outrigger and bail.

Jef: Prob after pulling a ghost-whisperer last act save or something, but yeah right?

Haha that would be awesome.

Anupa: You’re projecting your Asian hopes and dreams onto Miles

Jef: Shit, can’t a dude just like Miles because he’s awesome?

*gets uppity*

Anupa: He’s awesome because he’d so bail

LOL NOOO you said UPPITY!!

Jef: Wanna jump to LA for a bit?

You got your wish. You saw Rousseau all fresh and clean.

Anupa: That made me happy :)

I love me some Rousseau.

Jef: “Even if we have to kidnap you”

womp womp

Anupa: Haha i know right.

Do you think her and Ben will hook up?

Jef: Yes! I wanted them to do that white middle-aged kitchen kiss that happens in every movie.

I felt the chem!

Anupa: LOL I can’t visualize what you’re talking about BUT I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

Jef: Yeah don’t ask me for an example. But it happens!

Anupa: Jesus this episode was piecey as hell eh?

Dez wanted to help Locke “let go” and in the process forced Ben to have visions of the timeline-as-we-know-it. He then went and turned himself into the police for running over Locke and beating up Ben and ended up in the same holding cell as Sayid and Kate at the same prison as Sawyer and Miles, who are later going to a concert at Miles’ dad’s museum.

On their way to county, Dez breaks Kate and Sayid out with the help of Hurley (and Ana Lucia). Those four are also headed to the concert. The concert is also where Jack is supposed to be heading, after he meets with Locke who is now convinced he needs to “let go.” Jack is going there because his son is playing piano. His babymoms will also be there (I’m thinking Juliet).

Jef: Sidenote: Dez has been walking around match-making and hitting people with cars. It’s funny that this whole time he really could have just been punching people in the face.

Anupa: I know right? Talk about unnecessary force.

What do you think is going to happen? And what role does Dez play in all of this?

Jef: Shit, all that and I have no answer for you.

Which I LOVE.

I have no idea what’s going on.

Anupa: It’s played out quite beautifully

Jef: It has, definitely. And it feels good, I’ve been riding for them but also nervous that they’ll drop the ball regardless.

But I am so ready for the finale.

Anupa: LOL it feels like the ending of White Teeth!! Hopefully something stupid with a mouse doesn’t happen to fuck it all up!

Jef: HAHAHAHAHA

Anupa: Where the Chalfens at?

Jef: The end.

I just want to throw in there that I don’t care what anyone says, Michelle Rodriguez is my girrrrl

Anupa: Yo, she’s fine as hell. And crazy. I love that. If I were a lesbian, I’d pursue her.

Jef: Those multi-r’s look mad stupid but I’m sticking to them—all of them

YES THANK YOU.

And I do not care one bit that she always plays the same role.

It’s a fucking fantastic role, and more people should use it!

Anupa: She is the consummate tough Latina chick, the hardened little sister of three cholos. Who plays on the side of the good guys, but turns an eye to her sibling’s

trangressions because it’s family first.

Jef: LOL. Yeah whatever she is, I’d like a piece of it.

Anupa: Okay, I have a question: Jacob needs to find a replacement because Smokey’s figured out a way to kill him and therefore get off the island, but….Jacob’s been dead for like, a while now

Jef: A week!

Anupa: Okay, so what? Magic applies only some of the time? Like, if the guy is dead can’t he leave?

What I’m trying to say is this: Jacob’s had like millions of years or whatever it is to find a replacement, but he slacked and got himself killed

Jef: Ahahhahah

Anupa: He shouldn’t get an extension on finding a replacement! It’s too late! HE DEAD.

Jef: I don’t think he slacked though (though judging by his eyebags, yes. He did.)

I kinda just thought he’s been bringing people there for years and they’ve all been shitheads

Anupa: Yeah I get that. But now he’s dead, so doesn’t that mean Smoke wins?

Like I don’t get the lag time.

Jef: I don’t think Smokes can leave until all the candidates are dead.

You know?

Anupa: OH

:(

[Note: later on, we came to the extremely late realization that Jacob fully dies once his ashes are burned. Hence, Smocke kicking his body into the fire after Ben did the deed, Ilana gathering up the ashes (and there's the reason she exists in the first place!) and Hurley taking the ashes from dead-Ilana's tent. It's a stupid-ass loophole but whatever.]

Jef: No but hold up, here was my other thing:

Because I thought the cave scrawls were magical—if Jacob scratches you off, you didn’t count anymore, so the ones left were the ones Smokes had to murder.

BUT he told Kate it “was just a line of chalk in a cave.”

So I dunno how the candidates are magical at all, at least until they drink the moonshine.

But yeah, regardless. I’m sure the game is Smokes can’t leave until they’re dead.

Anupa: The look on Jack’s face when he drank the river water was super hilar

Jef: LOL yeah he gave Jacob the gas face after

Anupa: !!! I love the gas face

Jef: “You’re like me now.” Which I assume means high as hell.

Anupa: Watch, next week Jack’s gonna be all heavy-lidded too

Jef: Dude I will die.

Anupa: And that’s why Dharma keeps getting food drops!

Jef: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

Anupa: To sustain Jacob’s munchies

Jef: STOPPP

HAHAHAHAHAH

Anupa: Sorry ahahahhahahahhaha

Jef: *five minute break for laughter*

All Smokey wants is to get away from centuries of stoner talk

Jef: Did you see that photoshop job of Smokey and Jacob where it says “Fucking magnets? How do they work?”

And it’s the dagger stuck to the well?

Anupa: Hahah no! I wish I did though!

Jef: That’s the whole show, right there.

Anupa: Again, the end.

Jef: Ok but yo:

I was thrown for a loop this episode

I was really sure that Jack would end up not taking the job!

He’s the island guardian! This is big! It’s been building to that for 6 years, but still. BIG.

Anupa: Okay, BUT did you really think any of the others wanted it?

Jack was the only logical choice for the job and he knew it. You could tell by the look’s on the other’s faces:

Sawyer? PSH. Kate? Nope. Hurley? No way dude.

And we knew it had to be a Jack v Locke showdown

Jef: Imagine someone else put their hand up? Jacob would be like “ehhhhhhh really?”

“I dunno Kate, it’s a lot of hours, and it’s hard work…”

Anupa: Hahah word. So Locke has to kill all of them…. he’s looking for Dez who is now apparently the key to everything

And magical Jack et al are setting up to kill Locke

Jef: Yup, and sideways Jack and Locke have just cemented their bromance.

Anupa: So what’s gonna happen?

Your thoughts?

Jef: They’re both “letting go”

Anupa: OOH

Jack letting go in our timeline, Locke letting go in the other one?

Jef: Both!

They’ve met in the middle sorta

Anupa: Do you think that perhaps this process of letting go might permeate through to Locke’s now reanimated body?

And affect something to do with Smokey?

Jef: Honestly, I’m not sure what to expect.

But I expect big things from Jack, Jack 2.0, Locke, Dez, and an assist from Miles

That’s my play.

Oh and waaaaaalt?

Lowercase w because I am not so sure.

Anupa: JESUS, YES. PLEASE LET WALT SHOW.

OMG, WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What was Michael? An artist right? Think he’ll show up at the museum?

AVEC WALT?

Jef: Was he?

If so, DOPE.

Anupa: Yeah dude, remember? But he had to work construction because life is rough for an artist with a kid.

Jef: True! And speaking of the museum, I’m also looking to Farraday to play a part as well.

Shit, I’m hyped.

Anupa: TRUE SAY.

Jef: Aside from Walt, is there any other return you want to happen?

Def Juliet with the going-dutch coffee.

Anupa: Penny.

Jef: Word.

Shannon?

Anupa: Meh

Jef: lol

Anupa: FUCKING VINCENT!

Jef: chomp chomp

Anupa: They just wrote him off the show

Jef: He might be dead. They’re gonna need facsimiles Lassie-style

Anupa: To be honest, when Ben, Richard and Miles were in Ben’s closet and then they heard a noise and came out… I was hoping it was Vincent snuffling around in that cupboard. You can ask my roomie; I yelled VINCENT!

Jef: I’m sure he’ll get a cameo

If there’s one thing Lost loves, it’s referencing itself. I expect it to go nuts for 2 and a half.

Ok, any final words?

Anupa: I’m rooting for the alternate timeline, because Alex needs a dad

Jef: “He doesn’t get to save his daughter.” BLAOW.

I’m not fully sure anymore, but I still think a blend is coming.

But after this week, I’m totally not surprised if they go somewhere else.

Anupa: They’ve rendered us basically useless in terms of guessing where this is gonna go

Jef: They have!

Anupa: Which is the best set-up for a finale in all reality.

We are literally expectation-free.

Jef: We are.

We’ve let go, Anupa.

Anupa: OG

*OMG

Tags: Desmond, drinking the magical kool aid, getting high on the island, gratuitous deaths, Hurley, Jack, Jack's son, Jacob, Kate, Lost, Lost recap, Sawyer, Smokey