Wayne was literally caught holding the bag, which in this case contained a charger and earbuds. Corrections officers  (who apparently know how these MP3 gizmos work) later found the accompanying iPod in a neighbouring cell to Wayne’s.

To steal a thought from The Wire, there’s definitely a Dickensian aspect to this story. You have one of the worlds biggest rappers, who makes his profession bragging about his street cred and how hard he is. He goes to jail for gun possession, which for someone who plies Wayne’s trade is like punishing a carpenter for carrying a tape measure.

Now, although he’s living what many would consider the natural consequences of his brand identity, he is so deprived that he needs to illegally smuggle an iPod into jail. Let’s not be confused, as The Voice article mentions, smuggling electronics into prison is not a small matter. The fact Wayne did so speaks either to how desperately he’s missing music, or more cynically, how continually skewed his perspective is on the consequences of his action.

Either way, kind of tough to not sympathize with the guy.

via: The Village Voice

• I hate joke rap. I can’t stand listening to it, I don’t find it funny and I go all stony-faced when it’s forced on me. Even if there are decent punchlines and alla that jazz, it all boils down to an ironic frat boy bastardization of a beloved art form. Sean Fennessey makes a good case for joke rap in this Village Voice piece, but he also proves my point—but can someone tell me the big, glaring difference standing between a Das Racist or a Donald Glover and Lonely Island?

• Few would dispute that David Simon’s The Wire is intelligent television — some might even argue it’s the smartest show ever penned. Two years after it ended however, the show continues to enjoy heady times; but this time quite a bit more literally. The Wire is starting to pick up steam with academia as social scientists increasingly employ the HBO tome as educational text. Slate breaks down why Harvard and Duke are among colleges now teaching The Wire, while Eric Beck’s essay on Omar Little as neo-liberal subjectivity shoots TV analysis from the AV-Club to the Ivory Tower. Get it? Shoots? Har Har Har.

• I’m sober and well rested as I write this statement. I’m also a guy. But that doesn’t mean I don’t learn lots from Tigerbeatdown’s feminist blogger Sady; her awesomely-written 13 Ways of Looking at Liz Lemon muses on how a particularly popular brand of Lemon-ish feminism is not only midguided but selfish, on how 30 Rock works as a show, and of course, on Sady herself. I’m always up for a good 30 Rock think piece. It’s like they stuff that show with as much critical catnip as they can, then just sit back and LOL as we scramble tooth and nail to unpack it. Also in this series: 30 Rock and conservatism, and my dad’s favourite: 3o Rock and Filipinos. Right, dad? Dad, where’d you go? Nobody loves me.

Of course, I have heard of other types of parties.

80′s parties. 70′s parties. Prom parties. Asshole parties (you have to wear American Apparel, and the party takes place on a yacht).

Rarely however have I ever witnessed first or second hand the space-time bending awesomeness that is a New York hipster attending a “Jersey Shore” costume party, which the Village Voice happens to have an entire photo album of.

I like to think this could be titled: “the situation,” lower case s.

Anyways, I have been trying to to think of interesting party ideas recently, and I have nothing else to post about today, so there you have it. I apologize. Now brainstorm for me: what’s the best themed party you’ve ever been to?

My current theme ideas after the jump:

• Cartoons
• Global dictators
• Other people who will be attending the party in a hat and everybody gets somebody else
• The person you hate most in the world (could overlap with the above theme)
• Dead authors
• Characters from the movie “Starship Troopers”
• Colours that rhyme with “urple”
• Anyone who appears regularly on a TLC show

Nathan Whitlock’s recent piece in Maisonneuve, The Not-Quite Novel, argues that Canadian publishers, in their quest to cut budgets and appeal to as any people as possible, are creating a market where a “growing number of [Canadian] books … appear to great fanfare and then almost immediately disappear, being too thorny and/or sober to entertain, yet too conventional and broad to last.” It’s a moral ambiguity that is purely Canadian – not snooty enough to create high literature, not populist enough to write the Da Vinci Code – and it could be why our bookstores are flooded with U.S. writers.

Esquire recently published what is probably their most expansive piece on Jay-Z. What I mean is it goes beyond the typical drug dealer tale and explores the source of Jigga’s mogul side (although you could probably say they’re inextricably linked). The problem myself, and others like the Village Voice‘s Zach Baron, have with it is it reads condescending: to both Jay-Z and Jay-Z fans. While some good points are raised and there’s probably some insight gleaned from the average casual Jay-Z fan (i.e. the people who are the focus of writer Lisa Taddeo’s argument), Baron puts it succintly when he basically writes that what Taddeo is putting forth in this story is actually not–journalism students, plug your ears–newsworthy.

Dear Roger Ebert: I love you, man. You are doing some of your best writing in this most recent, post-surgery phase of your career. It’s awesome that you are awesome at blogging. You are now my official answer to that stupid question, “Who would you most want to have dinner with…?” Well, not the dead or alive version, but for the alive version, yeah, maybe you. Except, you can’t really eat dinner, or talk, so instead maybe we’d just watch “Dark City” or some shit? I would dig that a lot.

End of Decade lists can get tiresome, but that’s no reason to ignore Matt Zoller Zeitz’s “Directors of the Decade” series at Salon.com; Zeitz writes thoughtful essays where others just make linkbait. Be sure to check out Michael Bay at number 10, where the film writer provides a sober, fair analysis of someone most would rather ignore or ruthlessly mock.

Tara Stiles is a Yoga expert and contributor for the Huffington Post. Her most recent column is about dealing with difficult people, but mostly reads like a hilariously over-dramatized account of her traumatic experiences in educational environments. I’ve never understood people who had life changing stories from kindergarten or had formative life experiences based on how bad their high school years were. Perhaps I lack empathy, but I can’t help but just laugh at Stiles’ anecdotes about her sad-sack teenage era, even though I know she is attempting to gain emotional currency. I suppose it’s a cultural difference between Canada and the U.S., right there with ketchup chips and saying soda.

Celebrating a landmark birthday just before the end of a seemingly-full-of-promise 00’s has got me all angsty and cynical. Things weren’t supposed to be like this! Maybe my decade-long habit of chilling, hanging out and other varieties of loafting are to blame, but why point the proverbial finger at myself when I can blame the Internet? During a time when epochal lists are making the rounds, the Village Voice’s count down of reasons “Why This Decade Sucked” is mad refreshing. Especially reason number 10: “Social Media Ruined the Internet” which addresses aforementioned feelings as a necessary by-product of increased social isolation thanks to the WWW.

New York Times Magazine’s Ninth Annual Year in Ideas

Everybody loves lists. The New York Times has compiled more than a bunch of links however. Rather, this is a bullet point presentation of the year’s best ideas; conveniently summarized and organized from augmented reality advertising to zombie attack science. Sure, aggregate articles may be played out ’round this time of year, but looking backwards can be extra enjoyable when it reminds us just how far we’ve come. -Simon

Hope Witsell’s Sexting Suicide & Can Anyone Stop Facebook?

Slate currently has an article up about the suicide of a Florida 13-year old who committed suicide after a botched attempt at sexting with a schoolmate. It basically decries the rising trend in cyber bullying, exacerbated by how easy it is to do behind the anonymity of the internet, coupled with the viral nature and fibre optic speed of online gossip. Over in the tech section, Slate also has a column up describing how Facebook continues to gain users, becoming increasingly ubiquitous in our lives. I can’t help but feel as if the two articles are somewhat related. -Simon

Waxing poetic about lakes, mountains, and oh ya, terminal lung cancer

There is nothing funny about terminal lung cancer, obviously, but when award winning novelist/humourist Paul Quarrington takes a shot at it in this ongoing series for the National Post, it definitely brings a few smiles. Diagnosed with type four lung cancer (so bad that doctors actually tried to convince him to just give up after he suffered a seizure, kidney failure and heart attack, all at the same time), Quarrington decided to go on tour with his band across Canada. His endearing and beautifully crafted account of what goes through your mind when you’re told you are going to die should win a national newspaper award. I truly hope he’s still around to accept it.-Jesse

Obama, where art thou? | (Right behind you boo! Ah dude shoulda seen your face lols!)

Everybody wants to know, Who is this guy accepting peace awards and ordering troops, and where did Obama go? Which is funny, because he ran on the promise of a war in Afghanistan, but not funny ha-ha. But hey, with all of us struggling to buy Christmas presents for loved ones this year, let’s not forget the economy issue either. So what the dill? If you take all the recent accounts of Obama and spread them on your floor and squint your eyes and do a really-fast neck-roll, yeah, like that (you weirdo), you end up with the impression that Obama is still a principled prez who weighs decisions carefully after considering all intel, but too bad he’s gone and surrounded himself with a grip of douchebags. Which I mean, yeah, sure. Right? -Jef

“Free Gucci, Fuck Diplo and the history of ‘Free _____’”

Popular club DJ/producer Diplo wasn’t the happiest about an article written this week by Brandon Soderberg for the Village Voice, one of America’s largest free weeklies. In it, Soderberg discusses the implications of a “Free Gucci” shirt that Diplo is selling coinciding with the release of remixes of recently-jailed rapper Gucci Mane’s Cold War Series mixtapes (whoa, meta). I’ve been a longtime Diplo fan, but was always curious about his choice to incorporate (or latch on to, as Soderberg might argue) largely marginalized themes and forms of music (baile funk, cumbia, B-more), and turn them into seemingly-underground-but-really-not hipster trends. He extends this theme to the T-shirts. Diplo responded via Soderberg’s blog and, in the end, it comes down to one person ascribing less-than-admirable motives to another person without really knowing anything about those motives. But if you’re curious about the political side of music, it’s a great read. -Anupa